When Aquaman says late in the movie he's doing what he's doing for all the people he loves, he must mean his dad and a bald bikie who asks for his picture in a bar - oh, and perhaps an arguing news team - because they're the only people we see him grunt and stare impassively at in his "surface" life, while under the water the most remarkable thing going on, much more interesting than the Lord of the Borings political fantasy going on between kings and Ocean Master and m'ladies on seahorseback, is everyone's underwater hair, by far the most animated thing in this terribly acted and very uneven superhero movie, a bit Brendan Fraser's The Mummy, a bit LoTR, a bit kitsch Flash Gordon scifi but always, most consistently, um, wet.
★★☆☆☆
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