X (2022)

What makes this slasher unique is also, unfortunately, what makes it so tedious: it isn't until the last thirty minutes when grisly death starts being meted out in tried-and-true slasher style that the energy picks up and the heavy-handed exposition (that really only serves to longwindedly establish the lore of all slashers always) finally lets up; it hardly seems to matter (and in fact I didn't even realise until later when I read it) that actress Mia Goth plays both the villain and the heroine.

★★★☆☆

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X2: X-men United (2003)

The best of all the X-men movies, this sequel of the original has it all - a thrilling non-stop action plot, moments of laugh-out-loud humour mostly thanks to Wolverine, and the best thing of all — alone, worth the price of admission — is the invasion scene at Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters in which audiences are treated to a fast-paced and exhilarating showcase of the mutants' weird and wonderful gifts.

★★★★☆

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X-men: Apocalypse (2016)

Nothing will ever compare to the school invasion scene in X2: X-men United in which audiences are treated to a fast-paced showcase of weird and wonderful mutant powers — here, in X-men number 9 (counting Deadpool), things are decidedly less artful: the mutant "gifts" are presented mostly in slow-mo and further laboured by exposition of the sort, "You're in my head!? How are you doing that!?" "It's my gift..." (an exchange between students at a mutant school), and in fact, aside from a strong whiff of a political agenda (there is a near decapitation performed by the villain whose prisoner is on his knees on a sandy desert floor) nothing actually happens — for inordinate amounts of time, the mutants pose smugly, chests out, arms akimbo against cgi backgrounds, frequently not doing anything at all while the villain, a hideous, mouldy Marlon Brando-lookalike with displeased downturned lips, grumbles and performs haircuts.

★★☆☆☆

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X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009)

This movie makes the mistake of stripping away too much of the mystery of the brooding Wolverine character, in a more cheaply made film than usual X-men instalments, with less impressive effects and a far too simple and often cornball origin story, disappointing for a series which is usually so stylish and complex.

★☆☆☆☆

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X-men: Days of Future Past (2014)

What the X-men franchise probably didn't need, with all its humans and mutants and feuding subfactions of each, was the added complication of time travel because this instalment involving a Terminator-style battle across time to stop assassin robots, is almost too convoluted to enjoy.

★★★☆☆

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X-men: First Class (2011)

This episode of the X-men franchise goes back to 1962 to explain Professor Xavier's love-hate relationship with Magneto (they used to be buddies) and calms down the fever-pitch energy attained over the course of the original three X-men movies while still delivering the themes and set-pieces expected of the series.

★★★★☆

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X-men: The Last Stand (2006)

The third installment of the X-men series dutifully upholds the superhero filmmaking law which states a third installment superhero movie must be so unrestrained it collapses from its own bombast.

★★☆☆☆

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