River Wild (2023)

There's not much connecting this thriller to the 1990's The River Wild starring Meryl Streep except the title and the fact that whitewater rafting and a psychopath feature, but beyond these things, this is a grim crime story, charmless and full of low budget nasty realism, not high adventure, that makes it feel more like a re-enactment on that 48 Hour tv true crime doco, the sort you might snap off when it gets too bleak.

★★☆☆☆

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Ready Or Not (2019)

The trouble with the premise of this quirky slasher - that a bride playing hide and seek on her wedding night discovers the game, played with her gaming family in-laws, is a murderous one - is that too quickly the bride is able to extricate herself from the family's gothic mansion, a move akin to taking your queen off the chessboard so it can run free across the game table, turning the game into a not terribly interesting foot chase outside between her and just one member of the in-laws' entourage...as though having set up the goofy premise the movie then didn't have enough smarts to keep the idea going for very long.

★★☆☆☆

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Jennifer’s Body (2009)

Buffy was interesting because her demon-slaying was analogous to the trials and tribulations of high school - and she lost more sleep over the latter than the former - but this horror comedy, obviously geared at Buffy audiences with its combination of demon-slaying, indie rock soundtrack, and high school drama, is a less sensible, less compelling concoction about two female students: one who has meaningful, consensual sex with her boyfriend, and one who honeytraps horny males and feeds on their dead bodies; the fact the latter, played by Megan Fox, was kidnapped and slaughtered by a four-strong gang of males is treated as a trivial detail - the important thing, apparently, is there is a right way to use your body, and Jennifer is an evil slut who deserves death, ok?

★☆☆☆☆

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