Godzilla vs. Kong (2021)

Of course, the single purpose of these kaiju movies is to stage spectacular cgi fights between the towering beasts, which this movie does impressively and without a boggly ping-pong eyeball in sight; everything else - a signing child, a conceptually confusing Hollow Earth, a mystical glowing axe, a plethora of unnecessary characters (many of them annoying children with no business being there at all), a visit to Hong Kong, mecha-robots, "skullcrawlers", is just a whole lot of nonsense to fill the time and whether you care less about this filler will depend on which side of thirteen you are. 

★★★☆☆ (my score)

★★★★★ (my nephew's score)

CINECAL: ONE SENTENCE REVIEW

Lady In White (1986)

I recall my mum suggesting I turn this off if it was too scary and I remember thinking how ridiculous she was being given it was just a silly ghost story with some cool special effects, but of course I was a child and rewatching this today I discover the fun supernatural romp of my 80s past actually tells a deeply disturbing story of a child serial rapist and killer and features among other distinctly adult things child murder, suicide, upskirting, masturbation, hideous unchecked racism from the mouths of children, an assassination, and while it features a not very satisfactory plot, you have to be impressed at the way director Frank LaLoggia manages to hide a supernatural psycho thriller for adults inside a Goonies-style adventure for kids and vice versa.

★★☆☆☆ (the psycho thriller for adults)

★★★☆☆ (the ghost story for kids)

CINECAL: ONE SENTENCE REVIEWS